I don't like you very much

The other day Mr. Shakestown and I were watching some garbage program on the telly when an advert popped up in which a couple was referred to as being a particularly great couple because their strengths and weaknesses balance each other out such that they make one great person.

As someone who is in a relationship that is made up of two. distinct. persons. I find this advert insultuous to my very core. The idea that two people must blob together into one in order to be worthy of praise from some random bloke on the telly is a clearly orchestrated attack on my personal agency and consent.

Yesterday afternoon, as I was putting on my wellies, I caught Mr. Shakestown's glance out of the corner of my eye, and told him plainly, "I don't like you very much, Sir." He replied, because we are so deeply connected that he understands my thoughts and we communicate in our own special (clearly two person-ed) language, "I don't like you very much either, madam."

And oh my dear, how does there, to my knowledge, as of yet, exist no Shakestown erotic fan fiction.